When I was younger, I wanted to be different. Being different, I imagined, made me someone. It established significance. I had my own thing, my own "code", my own me that made me stand out from everyone else. I carried that "difference" within myself through college, where I realized that it was a double-edged sword. On one hand, it gave me a "name", but on the other hand, it made me very lonely. I hid behind it, I retreated to it, because I didn't want to let anyone close to me... and honestly probably didn't even know how. I was safe, but I was in a self-made prison.
What I have learned about man's "quest for significance" is that our quest cannot ultimately be satisfied. Whatever we deem worthy of bestowing that significance on us -whether it be wealth, intellect, wisdom, a relationship, our social status, our job, our beliefs- will become something that rules us. I have learned that this quest for significance is a sham because the whole enterprise is built upon a lie. Every endeavor to establish a significance and glory of our own apart from God is the essence of sin. It reveals how naturally the human heart seeks this kind of glory for itself, unwilling to settle for being even an "ordinary" creature who serves and loves the living God.
I have found now, however, that I can taste and see the sweetness of belonging to God and having a glory and purpose that is not my own but bestowed by my Maker... not depending on comparison to other people, not depending upon my works, but depending on Him who made me.