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The Drug of Being Offended

Being offended is the new pastime, but it doesn't have to be.  Long before it became cool on social media to be offended, I took up the sport of holding onto offense.  I've been a true pioneer in the art of brooding, a regular Tom Brady, a man ahead of his time, and I know I'm not alone in that.  But holding onto offense is like the worst kind of sport you can play.  The only ones involved in this game are you and those unwilling participants within the radius of the steam fuming out of your nostrils.  Any spectators who get close enough to watch are more like witnesses of a slow train-wreck.  Plus, there's no amazing come-back story where the score gets flipped in overtime and your team, the "good guys", win.  There are no wrongs righted in the making of this movie, and there's no happy ending to it. The only thing that happens, in our cosmic protest, is we hurt ourselves and those closest to us.  

The offense game is addictive, though -I'll give it that.  It allows us to believe that the offenders on our growing list are our real problem, which gives us something as a bonus.  It provides safe cover for us to avoid things in us that we don't like... insecurity, fear, shame, and uncertainty about who we are, if we are loved, and if we can accomplish our goals.  At least for a moment, holding onto anger over our "raw deal" or how this or that person was belittling or insensitive or treated us unfairly makes us feel big instead of small.  It's like a drug, a moral booster shot, but the effects are temporary while the side effects are life threatening.  Don't get me wrong, people can be real jerks -and I'm one of them.  This isn't minimization. It's acknowledging that holding onto offense doesn't get back what we feel was taken from us and is a destructive exercise in carrying the bag for someone else's sin -real or imagined.  It doesn't get back what we feel has been taken from us.  Holding onto offense is refusing to believe that there is One who does see me, that there are better things to do with my time and energy, such as focusing on the good work He has for me to do in this world, and that even our offenders are people, too.

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