I took this photo 8 years ago. Though I remember being in a fairly good place that day, I frequently went to this bench tucked away on a path in the woods to read and pray. I went there often during some pretty dark times. I brought my restlessness, I brought my anguish, and I went to seek after God. Most of the time, I did not leave there feeling any different. In fact, during much of that season, what I experienced most of the time was silence. The skies seemed empty.
In the Psalms, there is a phrase that is repeated often. "Why do You hide Your face from me?" Consider Psalms 13, 27, 44, 88, and 102, to name a few. I am thankful for these Psalms because, among other things, they normalize the experience of what we perceive as God's absence. The idea of God "hiding His face" speaks of His presence turning away, His hand seemingly withdrawing from our lives. These are hard places to be in, for we know one thing well: Where else is there to go? Nowhere.
While most of these Psalms end in a high-note (with the exception of Psalm 88), where the Psalmist remembers back to times of God's great works and the experience of great love and then looks forward in hope to restoration, the New Testament gives us a new color for this experience that we would not otherwise have. We see two striking things. First, we see that it was when our earthly perception of God's involvement seemed the most dark and distant, when the Son of God hung on the cross and was then laid in the belly of a cave, that was when God was the most active in accomplishing His greatest works for us. And second, we see that the experience of struggle is the very gift God gives to draw us to Himself, to know Him in ways we would not otherwise.
If you're in a valley, right now, don't lose hope. If you're waiting and struggling, keeping waiting more, but know this: God is at work. He promises to work all things for your good, and He is bringing it to pass even when you do not see it.
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